Do you know what was probably not a great idea? Trying to read a nonfiction book about a law enforcement whistleblower in October 2025.
As much as it’s highly relatable and incredibly well-written, I was having trouble motivating myself to actually get into it due to tired gesture. It was just a little too close to home with our current reality in the U.S. and it was unwittingly causing me to avoid reading altogether.
Growing up, my mom always told me I was burning the candle at both ends. Between personal research, school, work, and volunteer efforts, I’ve been activisting a bit too hard for too long, and it’s far past time to admit it’s burning me out.
I decided to save that read for next month, when hopefully I have a bit more bandwidth, and give my nervous system a little rest for at least one of my extracurriculars. I’m trying my best (and sometimes almost succeeding) to not hold too much shame in that.
That’s how, on another lovely insomnia evening, I decided my brain needed some comfort food.
Enter…
The Heartbreak Hotel
Ellen O’Clover
Top quotes
“I believe every word I said: nature is the greatest force of calm I’ve ever known. There’s nothing better for my own enormous feelings than to be made to feel small.”
“You trusting me feels like love. Because you’re so smart, and so successful, and when you trust me — it makes me trust me, too. I need that from you.”
What I really loved about this book was not only personally relatable it was, although goodness it was in many ways. What I really appreciated was how it addressed trauma, and the ways it can affect relationships and development at multiple stages of long term growth.
Meeting such a delightful variety of fictional characters going through their worst moments; and seeing how they showed up for one another and themselves, was so needed in this moment.
People who’ve been through similar traumas; whether breakups, loss, or abuse, can have wildly different responses. Two people who go through the exact same event can have completely different experiences and be affected differently. Yet we can still relate to the pain we see one another going through.
This book was a lovely depiction of two people who’ve been hurt in such different ways learning to see and understand one another through communication; even when those conversations are a little bumpy.
I think that’s such a gift of learning to talk about trauma that I don’t know if I’ve put into words before. It’s ok to be actively learning how to cope with something. That won’t always look perfect, but as long as you’re open about how it’s affecting you others will be there to support you.
Most of my very closest friends are people who have been through incredibly hard things. I would argue that most people have been through incredibly hard things. It’s just that some people learn how to talk about it and some don’t.
Those who don’t feel so lonely. And loneliness is mean. It tells you that people are right to stay away. That you’re broken and no one cares.
But they do. I do.
The Black Angels: The Untold Story of the Nurses Who Helped Cure Tuberculosis
Maria Smilios
Top quotes
“Maps and lines had defined her entire life. They were drawn throughout history, straightened, elongated, bent up and down by people who met in town halls and state capitals and now in the federal government. She had spent too many years confined inside those lines, told where to go, when, and for how long. She had come here to change her life, to live as a professional, and to put down new roots.”
Did I say something about taking a break from activism? Don’t worry, I decided to revisit a book I loved from a few months back.
It’s a gorgeous thing to read a book where the author is clearly so passionate about the subject matter. That was very much the case in The Black Angels: The Untold Story of the Nurses Who Helped Cure Tuberculosis.
Smilios’ highly-researched deep dive into the lives of these compassionate trailblazers is a powerful reminder of the importance of intersectionality in healthcare.
By centering narratives of Black women who were nurses at the forefront of the deadly TB epidemic, she illuminates a critical aspect of medical history that’s been glossed over for far too long.
The story of The Black Angels offers a stark contrast to the often sanitized portrayal of medical progress; highlighting issues like unethical experimentation, inhumane treatment, and lack of access to resources. Their composure in the face of appalling conditions and systemic racism is both inspiring and heartbreaking.
The distrust many underserved communities hold towards the medical field is rooted in historical injustices like those documented in this book. Smilios’s work shines a light on the complex and often oppressive systems that have shaped healthcare in America, making The Black Angels an essential read for anyone interested in digging up the toxic roots of health disparities.
Get literature
Something I find beautiful about book clubs is the space and opportunity to share insightful ideas about things we value. There are countless incredible, intersectional accounts of activism, art, and experiences out there; and I intend to share them in a new resistance reading community.
My free newsletter highlights 2 books each month: one fiction and one nonfiction. Read what you want, when you have bandwidth. Hop in and out of the conversation. It’s a cozy evening in with loved ones.