Why can I barely look at the page lately?
It’s not that I’ve been avoiding you intentionally, I promise. I couldn’t possibly. It’s just that I was more or less running on cookies, wine, and caffeine for a redacted period of time. Several missed anxiety meds implied.
December is a hard time of year (traumaversary-wise) and it always sneaks up on me. Holiday cheer takes a bit of extra energy when you’re constantly waiting on the jump scare. Then, of course, there’s the general state of the world right now: political violence, media suppression, abuses of power. It’s hard to even keep up, much less feel like there’s anything we can do.
But all of the above is also exactly why we’re here, isn’t it?
Things feel scary. I’m scared every day, and with ever-increasing evidence that’s the correct vibe. The struggle with burnout is basically the new normal for us all at this point, no?
But we will not let our voices be swallowed up or silenced.
The timeline our world is in (largely due to the gleeful madness of abusive leaders) is something that needs artists, researchers, and writers more than ever. Our art is our resistance. If we aren’t documenting and calling attention to the crimes being committed at every level, we risk allowing them to be erased like so many others in the imposed historical record.
How do we move without any clue where to go from here? How do we regain momentum without the same hope of retribution or recovery we had before? What exactly is our motivation? Our call to action?:
Despite how inequality is made to seem natural, scarcity is manufactured. We no doubt have the means to guarantee that everyone has jobs, healthcare, education, housing, and the ability to ensure millions of children do not go hungry. But we must demand a permanent divestment from policing, prisons, and the entire carceral apparatus, and a radical reinvestment in public goods that reflect our interdependence as people…Many people want a full-fledged alternative to materialize before they’re willing to act. But it’s in our daily actions and shifts in thinking that new worlds are first conceived… As just one person, let’s band together with all the other just people who are equally hungry for change.
— Benjamin, R. (2023). Viral Justice: How We Grow the World We Want
This is a time to create. Even when you can’t bring yourself to share your own work: Make. Read. Think. Connect. Support.
While you’re at it: Breathe. Get a good rest when you can. Finish your entire meal. Keep your strength up in the ways most important to you. For goodness sake, unclench your jaw.
It’s a lot to ask, for sure. But we will not let them make us disappear.
